My mom sent me a book in the mail. It's titled What If? with the subtitle Writing Exercises for Fiction Writers, by Anne Bernays and Pamela Painter. At first I thought hoo boy, another book on writing, great. I can waste time doing exercises that I will never actually use in my writing. Another pair of published writers trying to tell other people how to write, etc. These were my thoughts, negative and pessimistic, I realize.
Then I thought, maybe I could use it. What's the harm? I could read it and do the exercises, and put it in my blog with my thoughts. Hell, it'd keep me writing something, and it would give me material for blog posts, so why the hell not? It's better than not writing anyways.
So I read the introduction. Apparently these two writers are professors who have taught numerous writing courses. Well I guess those are good credentials for writing a book on writing. These two go back and forth on the topic of writing and actually sound intelligent and thoughtful. Now I'm thinking, maybe this book is a good idea. Who am I? Some awesome writer who doesn't need to work on his own craft? How big of an ego do I have? Why not perform these exercises and see if something actually sparks inspiration in my head, or at the very least makes me one shred of an ounce better in any way in regards to my writing. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? I write alot of crap. But that's normal.
So the first exercise is about starting the story. It is essentially about how you want to start a story right in the middle of some action. The background is something you can get to later. You want to hook the reader in with the first sentence, so bam, start it with the detective getting shot at, the monster eating somebody, Joe Shmoe losing his job, etc. Start it in the middle. You can always get to the background, to the real beginning of the story later, after you've pulled the reader in. This is, of course, great advice that I've heard a thousand times. I know it. It's essential if you want somebody to read something.
The book then gives many examples of published stories' first sentences, showing how they all start the reader off in 'the middle of things'. They are good examples, but they leave out my most favorite starting line of any story/novel/whatever anywhere.
"The man in black fled across the desert and the gunslinger followed." -The Gunslinger, Stephen King
I truly love that line. The second I read it, I was hooked. I was going to gobble that book up regardless of how shitty it might be, simply because the first line is perfection. Of course, the book turned out to be fantastic as well, but that's beside the point. I would've read that book no matter what. How can you not read that book, after that line? Mystery, tension, conflict...It's all there. Who is the man in black? The gunslinger? Why is one chasing the other? And it's so simple! So plain. 12 words. No names, no history, no background, nothing but the simplest line. I love it.
Anyways, here's a first line from two short stories I've started(long stories? Novels? I don't know yet) just for the hell of it.
"Harold E. Cudger woke up in a cold sweat, wondering just where the hell he was." -Bump in the Night(tentative title)
I like that starting sentence. It presents tension and mystery. Who is this guy and where is he? And why does he not know where he is? Here's the second:
"The alarm clock went off, rock'n'roll blaring out of it's speakers until a fist knocked it with entirely too much force." -Thriller(not really a title at all)
This one's a little less mysterious, less tension, but I still like it. Whose fist? Why did they hit the alarm clock with 'too much force'? I don't know. It might not be the best starting sentence. It might be deemed rather boring, but I suppose that's partially what I was going for, because the story suddenly becomes much more 'thrilling' (haha, get it?) soon after. I think it's also somewhat funny. The image of a fist knocking into an alarm clock with too much force. It could also be very cliche. Ah well. It happens.
Regardless, the actual writing exercise is to write ten starting sentences. I'm not supposed to worry about a larger story or turning the sentences into anything, I just need to write them. Then if possible, I should try to write a starting sentence every day. I suppose I will attempt this. Anyways, here's my ten starting lines. Let me know if anything catches your eye, and you think it could be a real story.
He knew all was lost when the assassin's sword swiped the Chosen one's head clean off.
Little Billy knew the monster would kill him one day, but his parents wouldn't listen.
"Well, you really fucked up this time, you know that?"
Terry really thought everything was going fine until he was shot in the stomach.
The old saying was false, dead men did talk, you just had to listen right.
Sometimes, when Johnny sat in that dark damp cellar for awhile with the lights off, he thought he could hear voices talking, talking to him and telling him terrible awful things.
Damien didn't know he was dead until he stood over his own corpse and said "Shit," though nobody could hear him of course.
There was always a black cat watching Jerry when he left and entered his apartment building and for some reason, it was starting to freak him out a little.
The howling was loud and excited, as if proclaiming to the world, We have killed and will kill again.
When Terry saw the truck, she knew it wasn't going to stop in time.
Well there, there's ten starting sentences. Some of them I even quite like and think could be the start of a story that even now circulates in my mind, and I'm sure will continue to circulate even as I'm sleeping at night.
There's exercise number one finished. If anyone else would like to perform this exercise and send me the results, I'd love to see them and tell you what I think. You don't have to do ten or anything, send me as many or few as you want. I'd love to put them up here as well, if that would be alright with you. It'd be nice to see other people trying these things while I'm doing it. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
The Adventures of a Bouncer
I worked last night, even though I have not been trained, because a sister restaurant needed personnel last minute. It was my very first night as a bouncer, and I was a little nervous. I made the half hour walk wondering just how my night would go. Would I have to physically throw somebody out? Would punches be thrown? Skulls busted? Heads banged? Etc? These were my thoughts as I walked over Cambridge St. Bridge, drinking a redbull, and looking at Genzyme. Genzyme is a very large building, half of it is all glass so it looks rather impressive, especially at night, from a bridge over the river. Also, it is where my girlfriend works, from 8 pm to 6 am Friday-Monday. I waved, but I don’t think she saw me, considering I was about a mile or two away.
I arrived quarter before nine, the time I was to start. I was working at Tavern in the Square, otherwise known as TITS, a large restaurant with a large floor that would eventually turn into a dance floor as the night wore on. But I’m getting ahead of myself. I talked to the manager and a guy I guess I would call the Head Bouncer, or Head of Security, perhaps. One thing I noticed right away, practically everyone else who was a bouncer or manager was bigger than me. I guess I never quite realized how of-average-height I really was until I was in a room full of a couple hundred people packed together, some dancing, some staggering, meanwhile I’m attempting to keep an eye on everything happening in my section of the restaurant. It was interesting, that’s for sure. I was given a couple lines of advice/instruction. “We don’t touch anybody unless they touch us first. We don’t go in alone. Redlight means there’s a fight, greenlight means you need a manager for something that’s not so important, 1,2,3 for location, front/back…Kill them with kindness, don’t get physical unless absolutely necessary…” It wasn’t much for training, but I guess it was a few good guidelines.
So at nine o clock, I get to stand in jeans, a black polo, and black dress shoes, in one spot and keep an eye on everything. It was really easy at first, actually. There was only one really drunk person I saw and he seemed like a happy drunk. I got to catch some of the sports as well, considering the restaurant was a sports bar. I caught glimpses of the Giants game, the Greenbay game and the redsox game. So early in the evening, all I was really doing was watching people eat dinner and drink, my only real task being to keep customers out of the service area. I was on an elevated position, making my job easier.
This soon changed, however. I was moved to a spot near the large dance-floor-ish area, no elevation, near a door that I had to keep clear. More and more people piled in, making the place more and more crowded. I tried to watch everywhere, met with masses of big heads everywhere. It’s rather crazy, the way a bar/club works late night on the weekends. Take more people than should probably be inside, cram them together, give them lots of booze, the temperature cranks up so everybody’s sweaty and hot, then let ‘em loose! It’s chaotic and crazy at times.
There were only two altercations that I saw. One, there was a sudden noise, hard to explain, but I could immediately tell someone had thrown a drink on someone else, as liquid sprayed the air, and people nearby gave the familiar ‘Oooooooh’ when shit is about to go down. I immediately grabbed my walkie-talkie(there were no earpieces left), called out “Red One, Red One Front,” as I attempted to move through the crowd towards the situation. Not five seconds later, the head bouncer with a fellow bouncer charged in, taking control. It was hectic. I talked to a few people about what I saw, which was next to nothing, a couple guys were told not to come back in, and the night resumed as normal.
The other time, I just saw one of the managers standing nearby, I looked away, then back and he was gone. I walked around the corner towards the door and a couple bouncers go charging outside. I talked to the manager later and here’s what happened. “I give them every opportunity. You say Sir you need to calm down, sir you need to calm down, until they touch you to push you away, and that’s when you throw them out. We don’t want to see anybody hurt, we just want everybody to have a good time.” That’s the kind of thing I needed to hear, to learn.
The rest of the night was rather dull, other than a lot of extremely drunken dancing/grinding/making out. I kept an eye out even more carefully than before, after those two situations occurred. Eventually the lights came one, and we had to herd the customers out like sheep. Then we cleaned up and called it a night. I think I did alright for my first night ever as a bouncer without training. We’ll see how training goes and what happens after that. One thing I will say, is being a bouncer is great for people watching, because that is all you do. Stand and watch. Long periods of boredom punctuated with few short moments of intense chaos.
And that was my first night as a bouncer. Not that interesting, really, I didn’t even personally throw anybody out. I guess I need to work on that. Maybe next time.
Friday, August 12, 2011
So I'm going to be a bouncer
Yes, the title is true. I'm going to be a part-time bouncer. Actually, they don't like to use the word bouncer, as that immediately makes people think of 'bouncing' people aka busting skulls, as the manager put it, so technically, I'm going to be Front-Door Personnel, or in other words, I will be working The Door. It is quite a thing, this Door that I will be working. There are two Doors actually, I believe, the front and side door. Perhaps after many weeks of working the Front Door, I will yearn for something different, something new and exciting, and maybe then I will work the Side Door. I guess then I would be Side-Door Personnel. It's all rather confusing and complicated, in that it is in fact, completely simple. Who knows. It is a job, employment, even if only part-time. We will see what happens.
I had an interview for a teaching position. Finally. Someone looked at my resume and cover letter and actually thought, hey maybe this guy could teach stuff to kids or something. It's for an after-school program, and the title is actually Teaching Assistant, but hey it's something. Something to give me much-needed experience and interaction with students. It's also quite close to where I'm living, so that's nice too. Did it go well? Who knows? She had a few tough questions, about specific situations where I could not reply with teaching experiences as I have no teaching experiences, but I managed to use other experiences in work and life for answers. I interjected with specific questions to do with the school, and showed that I had done quite a bit of research on the school online, which is a good thing. I also wore a hot, uncomfortable suit, which made me look very professional. It would be very cool if I got this job, as I could very well likely keep this and the Door Personnel position, giving me two decent part-time jobs, with which maybe I could pay for rent, utilities, car insurance, and school loans. Blurgh.
I've been watching the show Louie, which is great, though in ways different than other shows are great. It's funny, of course, having been created by Louis CK who is hilarious.
Classic Louis CK
Even though it's funny, it's also many other things. Louis CK seems to love making his audience uncomfortable. Yes, watching this show will make you uncomfortable often, it shows awkward situations just a little too long, and it makes you feel so terribly bad for the main character who often gets humiliated, makes an ass out of himself, and generally does dumb things, all the while just being a regular joe who does stand-up comedy. It's not a show that makes you feel good, or happy, or even satisfied. It will often leave you going "Wha....Did that really just happen?" You will laugh often, and feel terrible about it. I love it.
I'm reading Catch-22, because I never have, and I hear things about it. I can't really remember what I heard about it, other than it is a book, that people have read, and they liked it maybe? It's interesting. It's funny, and a tad wacky. It's a book about war and the ridiculous nature of it, by being, itself, ridiculous. It's good. Read it.
So there it is, things going on in my life. I am also living with my girlfriend which is going great. I just hope I can begin making some money so I can pay rent and stuff.
To end it, here's more Louis CK.
Being Broke
I had an interview for a teaching position. Finally. Someone looked at my resume and cover letter and actually thought, hey maybe this guy could teach stuff to kids or something. It's for an after-school program, and the title is actually Teaching Assistant, but hey it's something. Something to give me much-needed experience and interaction with students. It's also quite close to where I'm living, so that's nice too. Did it go well? Who knows? She had a few tough questions, about specific situations where I could not reply with teaching experiences as I have no teaching experiences, but I managed to use other experiences in work and life for answers. I interjected with specific questions to do with the school, and showed that I had done quite a bit of research on the school online, which is a good thing. I also wore a hot, uncomfortable suit, which made me look very professional. It would be very cool if I got this job, as I could very well likely keep this and the Door Personnel position, giving me two decent part-time jobs, with which maybe I could pay for rent, utilities, car insurance, and school loans. Blurgh.
I've been watching the show Louie, which is great, though in ways different than other shows are great. It's funny, of course, having been created by Louis CK who is hilarious.
Classic Louis CK
Even though it's funny, it's also many other things. Louis CK seems to love making his audience uncomfortable. Yes, watching this show will make you uncomfortable often, it shows awkward situations just a little too long, and it makes you feel so terribly bad for the main character who often gets humiliated, makes an ass out of himself, and generally does dumb things, all the while just being a regular joe who does stand-up comedy. It's not a show that makes you feel good, or happy, or even satisfied. It will often leave you going "Wha....Did that really just happen?" You will laugh often, and feel terrible about it. I love it.
I'm reading Catch-22, because I never have, and I hear things about it. I can't really remember what I heard about it, other than it is a book, that people have read, and they liked it maybe? It's interesting. It's funny, and a tad wacky. It's a book about war and the ridiculous nature of it, by being, itself, ridiculous. It's good. Read it.
So there it is, things going on in my life. I am also living with my girlfriend which is going great. I just hope I can begin making some money so I can pay rent and stuff.
To end it, here's more Louis CK.
Being Broke
Thursday, August 4, 2011
The Next Step
That whole 1000 words a day thing kind of fell apart there. It was partially (mostly)(all) my fault, as I started it the day before I had rugby practice after work, and then a rugby tournament that weekend, leaving very little time for writing. Not that I really write when I have time anyways, I usually convince myself to do something else with my time, but ah well. It is what it is.
Speaking of, my old high school, Randolph Union High School (R U High?) now has a pretty sweet sign out front, with a sign that proclaims 'It is what it is'. I thought that was kind of cool, but also depressing maybe? I mean, look at it. RUHS "It is what it is". That's not exactly an inspiring message right there. On another note, why the hell didn't we have a sign when we were there? Goddamn kids get everything these days.
So I'm going to boston. For an indeterminate amount of time. The amount of time depends on if I find a job or I run out of money. Maybe it's a dumb idea, but I'm feeling pretty good about it. For awhile, I've felt like I've been in limbo. Purgatory. Stuck in between graduating college and finding a 'real' job. Living at home working for my dad, I feel like I'm not going anywhere. I ask myself, how do I get to the next stage? Where's that final boss that I beat and gets me into the next level? Well, I guess this is the final boss. Moving to a new place without employment and living off what I've saved (not alot). Will I defeat the unemployment monster or be forced to move back home, back into limbo, back to being stuck in between again. We will see. Unfortunately, instead of a sword and shield, I have a resume and cover letter. I think killing a dragon would be easier.
I saw Harry Potter. It was good. It always is. It's that kind of 'good' where it doesn't even matter how good the movie is, you're seeing characters you've grown up with, characters you've watched grow up, characters you care about facing evil bad guys with magic and shit. You can't not like that sort of thing, at least, not if you grew up reading Harry Potter like I did.
In other news, Tyra Banks is writing a three part novel series called Modelland, a fantasy set in a world where girls attempt to get into a magical modelling academy, and the story is about four girls who find 'smizes' and get into the school even though they're not supposed to. I couldn't make this shit up. I'm sure it will sell hundreds of thousands of copies. Teeny bopper girls everywhere will eat that shit up and ask for more. Makes me feel kind of depressed about writing, but, as RUHS says, 'it is what it is.'
I think I've had three or four coffees this morning. That might be one or two too many. Oh well. Such is life.
I wrote a thing that one day that I actually did write 1000 words. I guess it would be called a short short or something silly like that. I might as well put it up here.
The God's Favor
Speaking of, my old high school, Randolph Union High School (R U High?) now has a pretty sweet sign out front, with a sign that proclaims 'It is what it is'. I thought that was kind of cool, but also depressing maybe? I mean, look at it. RUHS "It is what it is". That's not exactly an inspiring message right there. On another note, why the hell didn't we have a sign when we were there? Goddamn kids get everything these days.
So I'm going to boston. For an indeterminate amount of time. The amount of time depends on if I find a job or I run out of money. Maybe it's a dumb idea, but I'm feeling pretty good about it. For awhile, I've felt like I've been in limbo. Purgatory. Stuck in between graduating college and finding a 'real' job. Living at home working for my dad, I feel like I'm not going anywhere. I ask myself, how do I get to the next stage? Where's that final boss that I beat and gets me into the next level? Well, I guess this is the final boss. Moving to a new place without employment and living off what I've saved (not alot). Will I defeat the unemployment monster or be forced to move back home, back into limbo, back to being stuck in between again. We will see. Unfortunately, instead of a sword and shield, I have a resume and cover letter. I think killing a dragon would be easier.
I saw Harry Potter. It was good. It always is. It's that kind of 'good' where it doesn't even matter how good the movie is, you're seeing characters you've grown up with, characters you've watched grow up, characters you care about facing evil bad guys with magic and shit. You can't not like that sort of thing, at least, not if you grew up reading Harry Potter like I did.
In other news, Tyra Banks is writing a three part novel series called Modelland, a fantasy set in a world where girls attempt to get into a magical modelling academy, and the story is about four girls who find 'smizes' and get into the school even though they're not supposed to. I couldn't make this shit up. I'm sure it will sell hundreds of thousands of copies. Teeny bopper girls everywhere will eat that shit up and ask for more. Makes me feel kind of depressed about writing, but, as RUHS says, 'it is what it is.'
I think I've had three or four coffees this morning. That might be one or two too many. Oh well. Such is life.
I wrote a thing that one day that I actually did write 1000 words. I guess it would be called a short short or something silly like that. I might as well put it up here.
The God's Favor
Steel sang upon steel in the middle of the courtyard, and the innocent man knew he was going to die. The two combatants backed off a moment, catching their breath. The innocent man looked scared, bloody stains covering the majority of his meager leather clothing. The other man faced him, half plate covering his chest and shoulders, chain mail underneath, large longsword in hand. The armored man wore no expression other than determination. He was there to judge, condemn, and grant justice, and in a trial by combat, there is only one punishment.
They had been fighting for fifteen minutes as the crowd cheered on around them. They were excited. This melee was lasting longer than most. They grew louder, calling for blood, knowing they would get it soon.
“I am innocent!” The innocent man called out, exasperated. “The Gods favor me!”
“Then what’s takin’ ‘em so long?” A man from the crowd called out. Laughter followed.
“Maybe they like to be dramatic!” Another responded, followed by more laughs.
The other man waited no longer, charging forward and swinging hard. The innocent man parried once, twice, a third time, but everyone could see he was getting tired and losing more blood all the time.
It didn’t last much longer. His sword was knocked out of his hand, and then the other sword was thrust into his chest, the point emerging between his shoulder blades. He stayed standing until the other man put a foot in his chest and pushed, unsheathing the sword from the flesh.
The crowd clapped and cheered. The man who lived wiped his sword off with the shirt of the dead man, sheathed it, and walked away. The crowd began parting as guards hurriedly went to take care of the corpse.
One child, sitting upon his father’s shoulders had a look of confusion upon his face. “The man was innocent. He should’ve had the Gods’ favor. He should’ve won.”
It was not his father who answered but an old man with but a few strands of white hair upon his head, standing next to him. He looked at the child with a grim smile. “It is not the innocent the Gods favor, child, it is the strong.”
They had been fighting for fifteen minutes as the crowd cheered on around them. They were excited. This melee was lasting longer than most. They grew louder, calling for blood, knowing they would get it soon.
“I am innocent!” The innocent man called out, exasperated. “The Gods favor me!”
“Then what’s takin’ ‘em so long?” A man from the crowd called out. Laughter followed.
“Maybe they like to be dramatic!” Another responded, followed by more laughs.
The other man waited no longer, charging forward and swinging hard. The innocent man parried once, twice, a third time, but everyone could see he was getting tired and losing more blood all the time.
It didn’t last much longer. His sword was knocked out of his hand, and then the other sword was thrust into his chest, the point emerging between his shoulder blades. He stayed standing until the other man put a foot in his chest and pushed, unsheathing the sword from the flesh.
The crowd clapped and cheered. The man who lived wiped his sword off with the shirt of the dead man, sheathed it, and walked away. The crowd began parting as guards hurriedly went to take care of the corpse.
One child, sitting upon his father’s shoulders had a look of confusion upon his face. “The man was innocent. He should’ve had the Gods’ favor. He should’ve won.”
It was not his father who answered but an old man with but a few strands of white hair upon his head, standing next to him. He looked at the child with a grim smile. “It is not the innocent the Gods favor, child, it is the strong.”
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
1000 Words A Day, Attitude and...shit, I don't know man. Just read it.
I'm starting a thing. I'm going to (attempt to) write a 1000 words a day. It can be anything. Short story, part of a novel, a blog post, whatever the hell I feel like, it doesn't matter, but I am going to write 1000 words. We will see how it goes. Or I guess I will see, considering I have no readers.
Why'd I pick a thousand? I dunno. It's not too hard, nor too easy. It's a chunk of words, a short story, a chapter of a short story, a section of a chapter of a novel, a sizable blog post, yadda yadda yadda. It's a thousand. If you think it's easy, try it. Do it for longer than a week, and I will personally give you a dollar. See? All you have to do is write 7000 words and you will have made more money than I have with my writing. Haha, self-negativity baby, always cheers me up.
Of course that doesn't make sense. At all. It is nonsensical. Or perhaps hypocritical. Noncritical? Hyposensical? I don't know. What I do know is self-negativity is bad. I'm not even sure if self-negativity is a real term for being negative about yourself, but you know what, I may have google at my fingertips but I don't give a damn. I'm keeping the term here, regardless of it's usage, definition, or latin-origin.
As I was saying, or typing...I guess I am saying these sentences to myself as I type them...Anyways, as I was saying/typing before I went off on a tangent, self-negativity is bad. I've got to say, I've realized Attitude is Everything. Okay, maybe Attitude isn't quite exactly EVERYTHING, but it's close. How you choose to feel or react to a situation will define how you feel.....I'm not really saying it correctly. Let's give an example. Say you just found out that you ripped your favorite shirt. Now that could possibly ruin your entire day, week, month or even your yeeeeaaaaarrrrr. Or you could be pissed about it for about five minutes, not let it affect you longer, and move on.
Now some might argue, hey, I'm not a robot, I can't just choose how to feel about something. But this is silly. We decide how long we're going to be angry about something. We choose whether to say "Oh fuck goddamnit thats my favorite shirt in the whole word what will I wear oh god this day is terrible blah blah blah" or "Well shit, that sucks, I liked that shirt. Oh well, I've got other shirts, the day really isn't terrible, things could be worse..." Now this obviously doesn't work in all situations. There are genuine things that cause emotions for an amount of time, and nobody can stop them. But I just seem to see lots of people that get upset over little shit, and they obsess over it and let it ruin their mood for so long, it just seems ridiculous. Don't make a mountain out of a molehill is a silly over-used statement and yet it's still fucking true.
I guess I think I'm a pretty laid-back guy. I try not to be negative, I try to assume the best of people, and I try not to let little things make me sad or angry or whatever for too long. You know what's the easiest way to do this? Realize there are people very worse off than you are. And don't just say yeah I know that what am I supposed to feel sorry cuz I got lucky and born here and whatever, I mean truly understand there are people without the shit that you have, or that things could be very worse, and when you do think about this, you realize little shit just doesn't matter. At all. So you ripped your shirt, or got snubbed by somebody or whatever, who cares? So you're pissed about something. You still got your fuckin life, don't ya? You still got health, food and water, friends and family that love you and support you, so don't obsess over little things. Don't let small shit ruin more than five minutes of your life. It's not like we got forever on this earth (damn man, 2012 is getting close!) so why spend time pissed off?
Anyways, that's why I say Attitude is Everything. If you can deal with a situation, realize it's not that big a deal, and move on, then you can spend more time being happy.
"Don't worry, be happy"
By the way, I wrote 1168 words today. Booya bitches.
Why'd I pick a thousand? I dunno. It's not too hard, nor too easy. It's a chunk of words, a short story, a chapter of a short story, a section of a chapter of a novel, a sizable blog post, yadda yadda yadda. It's a thousand. If you think it's easy, try it. Do it for longer than a week, and I will personally give you a dollar. See? All you have to do is write 7000 words and you will have made more money than I have with my writing. Haha, self-negativity baby, always cheers me up.
Of course that doesn't make sense. At all. It is nonsensical. Or perhaps hypocritical. Noncritical? Hyposensical? I don't know. What I do know is self-negativity is bad. I'm not even sure if self-negativity is a real term for being negative about yourself, but you know what, I may have google at my fingertips but I don't give a damn. I'm keeping the term here, regardless of it's usage, definition, or latin-origin.
As I was saying, or typing...I guess I am saying these sentences to myself as I type them...Anyways, as I was saying/typing before I went off on a tangent, self-negativity is bad. I've got to say, I've realized Attitude is Everything. Okay, maybe Attitude isn't quite exactly EVERYTHING, but it's close. How you choose to feel or react to a situation will define how you feel.....I'm not really saying it correctly. Let's give an example. Say you just found out that you ripped your favorite shirt. Now that could possibly ruin your entire day, week, month or even your yeeeeaaaaarrrrr. Or you could be pissed about it for about five minutes, not let it affect you longer, and move on.
Now some might argue, hey, I'm not a robot, I can't just choose how to feel about something. But this is silly. We decide how long we're going to be angry about something. We choose whether to say "Oh fuck goddamnit thats my favorite shirt in the whole word what will I wear oh god this day is terrible blah blah blah" or "Well shit, that sucks, I liked that shirt. Oh well, I've got other shirts, the day really isn't terrible, things could be worse..." Now this obviously doesn't work in all situations. There are genuine things that cause emotions for an amount of time, and nobody can stop them. But I just seem to see lots of people that get upset over little shit, and they obsess over it and let it ruin their mood for so long, it just seems ridiculous. Don't make a mountain out of a molehill is a silly over-used statement and yet it's still fucking true.
I guess I think I'm a pretty laid-back guy. I try not to be negative, I try to assume the best of people, and I try not to let little things make me sad or angry or whatever for too long. You know what's the easiest way to do this? Realize there are people very worse off than you are. And don't just say yeah I know that what am I supposed to feel sorry cuz I got lucky and born here and whatever, I mean truly understand there are people without the shit that you have, or that things could be very worse, and when you do think about this, you realize little shit just doesn't matter. At all. So you ripped your shirt, or got snubbed by somebody or whatever, who cares? So you're pissed about something. You still got your fuckin life, don't ya? You still got health, food and water, friends and family that love you and support you, so don't obsess over little things. Don't let small shit ruin more than five minutes of your life. It's not like we got forever on this earth (damn man, 2012 is getting close!) so why spend time pissed off?
Anyways, that's why I say Attitude is Everything. If you can deal with a situation, realize it's not that big a deal, and move on, then you can spend more time being happy.
"Don't worry, be happy"
By the way, I wrote 1168 words today. Booya bitches.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Stuff Happened
Stuff has happened. I graduated. Two hours of standing and sitting only to walk across a stage in five seconds. I didn't even get my diploma, I got my diploma cover. Woohoo. My parents weren't even in the same room, they were in another room watching it on a screen. This is because UVM decided it would be great to have a first-come first-serve arrangement rather than using tickets, so some kid could've had twenty family members and friends in the room meanwhile my parents had to watch me graduate on a screen, simply because they had arrived later than other people. Great job UVM. Another rousing successful graduation. The speaker was great too. A professor of proverbs, who basically just quoted proverbs for twenty minutes. Yeah, we'd never heard 'A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush', thanks.
So yeah, I'm all gradumatated, learned, intellectual, and educated. Good for me. Now I work for my dad doing manual labor/carpentry/construction. Really puttin' that english degree to use.
My plans to become a licensed teacher in Mass have hit a road block. I passed the tests, and I sent them my transcript and my licensure application is 'Ready for Review'. If it's ready for review, then someone goddamn review it already. It wouldn't take very long. 'Oh here's a transcript, he has a bachelor's degree, oh here's his tests, he passed' and BAM I would have my license.
I'm looking at jobs other than teaching as well. 'Document Specialist' and 'Document Controller' and similar positions for large companies. These jobs are about specializing and controlling documents, something I think an english degree has gotten me ready for. I've editted, proofread, written, and organized documents of all shapes and sizes. So far, I have yet to hear back about any of these positions.
On another note, another thing that has occurred, is that my computer is broken, it will not turn on at all. This is bad. I do not like it.
But it does give me more time to do stuff, like write in this blog. So there's that, I guess.
I'm also on Google+ now, which is interesting. I like it's ideas. The fact that you can control who sees what and organize friends and others into different groups is intuitive. It's lightyears ahead of facebook and I do not doubt that many many people will switch over once it's released and people know about it.
In other news, I'm reading George RR Sanderson's Song of Ice and Fire series and it is quite amazing. He takes fantasy and makes it feel real. It is entirely unpredictable, which seems hard to do in fantasy, to avoid the pitfalls of cliche and tropes in fantasy, but Sanderson does it well. It's a very gritty medieval setting and I am enthralled by it. Good stuff.
In other other news, maybe the US is going to default on our debt. That doesn't sound good. That sounds like something we wouldn't want to happen. All I know is I'm getting sick of the fucking bickering and general aggressive attitude between the two parties. All they seem to do is fight each other and nothing gets done. I think we need some more fucking moderate politicians in office.
But what do I know? I'm a 22 year old English degree graduate trying to make my way through the world. Stuff's happening, and I'm just trying to figure shit out.
"Be in my joint in two hours, we're forming a fuckin government!"
-Al Swearengen, Deadwood.
So yeah, I'm all gradumatated, learned, intellectual, and educated. Good for me. Now I work for my dad doing manual labor/carpentry/construction. Really puttin' that english degree to use.
My plans to become a licensed teacher in Mass have hit a road block. I passed the tests, and I sent them my transcript and my licensure application is 'Ready for Review'. If it's ready for review, then someone goddamn review it already. It wouldn't take very long. 'Oh here's a transcript, he has a bachelor's degree, oh here's his tests, he passed' and BAM I would have my license.
I'm looking at jobs other than teaching as well. 'Document Specialist' and 'Document Controller' and similar positions for large companies. These jobs are about specializing and controlling documents, something I think an english degree has gotten me ready for. I've editted, proofread, written, and organized documents of all shapes and sizes. So far, I have yet to hear back about any of these positions.
On another note, another thing that has occurred, is that my computer is broken, it will not turn on at all. This is bad. I do not like it.
But it does give me more time to do stuff, like write in this blog. So there's that, I guess.
I'm also on Google+ now, which is interesting. I like it's ideas. The fact that you can control who sees what and organize friends and others into different groups is intuitive. It's lightyears ahead of facebook and I do not doubt that many many people will switch over once it's released and people know about it.
In other news, I'm reading George RR Sanderson's Song of Ice and Fire series and it is quite amazing. He takes fantasy and makes it feel real. It is entirely unpredictable, which seems hard to do in fantasy, to avoid the pitfalls of cliche and tropes in fantasy, but Sanderson does it well. It's a very gritty medieval setting and I am enthralled by it. Good stuff.
In other other news, maybe the US is going to default on our debt. That doesn't sound good. That sounds like something we wouldn't want to happen. All I know is I'm getting sick of the fucking bickering and general aggressive attitude between the two parties. All they seem to do is fight each other and nothing gets done. I think we need some more fucking moderate politicians in office.
But what do I know? I'm a 22 year old English degree graduate trying to make my way through the world. Stuff's happening, and I'm just trying to figure shit out.
"Be in my joint in two hours, we're forming a fuckin government!"
-Al Swearengen, Deadwood.
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Why Don't I Just Put This Blog Post Off For Another Day...
Writing is a strange beast. I enjoy it, yet find myself lacking motivation to actually do it. I don't actually enjoy the process, the actual typing, though there is a sort of...calm peacefulness about the act of writing that I guess is pleasurable, a sort of focusing of the mind, a meditation in some strange way. But the real joy is after the act is completed, when I can look back at what I've written. I can say Lo! There is a thing that I have created. I have put letters together to form words, words together to build sentences, strung sentences together to form paragraphs and Behold! A text has been made! Ideas have been laid bare upon the page! Look at what I have created!
That is entirely overly dramatic and yet somewhat true. Writing is like any other act of creation, be it painting a picture or building a house. You can look at what you have done, see how you have put different materials together in different ways, and how it all has come together at the end. Maybe the house falls over, the picture falls flat and the writing is shown to be crude and simple, but the attempt is still there, amid the debris of failure, there are always bits and pieces showing that you tried, and to attempt and fail is always better then to never attempt at all.
I have heard I could write a column, but I am doubtful. To write a column, you need to write about real things, current events and such. I suppose I could do that, but I'm hesitant.
Take the NFL Lockout. In my head, it's simple, wealthy people versus wealthier people. The owners want more money, their billions of dollars every year just isn't enough to survive on. Must be tough. So they want a bigger piece of the massive monetary mountain the NFL provides, and to do so they want to add another game to the season, 18 game total.
The problem is, or as much as I know of it from watching ESPN infrequently and from what I hear from other fellow NFL fans, is they don't want to pay the players anymore for the longer season. Well obviously the players are pissed about this, longer season means more injuries for a sport already plagued with injuries.
To be honest, I don't care. I don't care if they add another game or not. Another Sunday watching football wouldn't be too bad, watching football is always a good time, though do Americans really need an extra day to sit on their ass, drinking beer, eating junk food, watching television and being bombarded with advertisements?
I literally don't care about the Lockout. 17 games in the regular season is fine by me, I just want to be able to watch the Giants occasionally. I don't have a side in this situation, I just want to watch football. I find it hard to side with the players, some of whom make ridiculous amounts of money for working out and playing a sport, something a lot of people do for fun. Yes there are injuries, but that's what happens when you strap in five inches of padding and the rules allow you to dive headfirst into each other at top speeds. We want the big hits, and the players do too, we both love it, so stop complaining about injuries, you as a player should know what you're getting into. High Risk, High Reward.
But I also can't side with the owners, who just seem like a bunch of greedy old bastards who just can't settle for the wealth they already have. Sometimes I think that might be a problem we all have. The American Dream, the idealistic notion of always striving for something greater has been turned into The American Greed, always striving for something of more monetary value. Nobody's happy with what they have, especially those who have more than others.
I don't give a shit about the Lockout, nobody that I know does either, other then for the fact that we may not be watching football come fall. Hell, maybe it'd be a good thing. Maybe we'd find something better to do with our free time like go outside on a nice fall Sunday. Fuck it, I'll go watch Rugby, where there are lesser pads, harder hits, and more sensible tackling rules.
But what do I know? I barely watch ESPN, so what can I say about this Lockout situation? It's probably much more complex and complicated then I think it is, so how can my opinion be relevant? I think this is why I refrain from writing about current events and why I stick to fiction. You have to do research when you write about actual events. It's so hard, in fact, it' seems almost impossible to know the truth of something. In this Information Age, I find it harder and harder to really know anything about what's going on in the world. Do I watch Fox News or CNN? Do I want a liberal bias or a conservative bias? Do I want to see crazy hippies with long dreads or rich old white guys and chicks shooting wolves out of a helicopter? It's insane how divided everyone is, black and white, right or left, blah blah blah. I barely watch the news anymore because, what's the point? I'm only getting one side of a story, I'm only getting what a few people want me to see. Someone's always selling something.
Man, did this get off-track. As I said, writing is a strange beast, and it doesn't always go where you think it will. You can run right off the trail and not even realize it, and then you're so far gone you're lost in the woods, and there's nothing to do but to keep on going, keep on writing. That's another thing about writing, about any act of creation, the unknown. The fact that you really don't know how something is going to turn out until it's all over and you look back on it. It's exciting and frightening at the same time.
The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say. ~Mark Twain
That is entirely overly dramatic and yet somewhat true. Writing is like any other act of creation, be it painting a picture or building a house. You can look at what you have done, see how you have put different materials together in different ways, and how it all has come together at the end. Maybe the house falls over, the picture falls flat and the writing is shown to be crude and simple, but the attempt is still there, amid the debris of failure, there are always bits and pieces showing that you tried, and to attempt and fail is always better then to never attempt at all.
I have heard I could write a column, but I am doubtful. To write a column, you need to write about real things, current events and such. I suppose I could do that, but I'm hesitant.
Take the NFL Lockout. In my head, it's simple, wealthy people versus wealthier people. The owners want more money, their billions of dollars every year just isn't enough to survive on. Must be tough. So they want a bigger piece of the massive monetary mountain the NFL provides, and to do so they want to add another game to the season, 18 game total.
The problem is, or as much as I know of it from watching ESPN infrequently and from what I hear from other fellow NFL fans, is they don't want to pay the players anymore for the longer season. Well obviously the players are pissed about this, longer season means more injuries for a sport already plagued with injuries.
To be honest, I don't care. I don't care if they add another game or not. Another Sunday watching football wouldn't be too bad, watching football is always a good time, though do Americans really need an extra day to sit on their ass, drinking beer, eating junk food, watching television and being bombarded with advertisements?
I literally don't care about the Lockout. 17 games in the regular season is fine by me, I just want to be able to watch the Giants occasionally. I don't have a side in this situation, I just want to watch football. I find it hard to side with the players, some of whom make ridiculous amounts of money for working out and playing a sport, something a lot of people do for fun. Yes there are injuries, but that's what happens when you strap in five inches of padding and the rules allow you to dive headfirst into each other at top speeds. We want the big hits, and the players do too, we both love it, so stop complaining about injuries, you as a player should know what you're getting into. High Risk, High Reward.
But I also can't side with the owners, who just seem like a bunch of greedy old bastards who just can't settle for the wealth they already have. Sometimes I think that might be a problem we all have. The American Dream, the idealistic notion of always striving for something greater has been turned into The American Greed, always striving for something of more monetary value. Nobody's happy with what they have, especially those who have more than others.
I don't give a shit about the Lockout, nobody that I know does either, other then for the fact that we may not be watching football come fall. Hell, maybe it'd be a good thing. Maybe we'd find something better to do with our free time like go outside on a nice fall Sunday. Fuck it, I'll go watch Rugby, where there are lesser pads, harder hits, and more sensible tackling rules.
But what do I know? I barely watch ESPN, so what can I say about this Lockout situation? It's probably much more complex and complicated then I think it is, so how can my opinion be relevant? I think this is why I refrain from writing about current events and why I stick to fiction. You have to do research when you write about actual events. It's so hard, in fact, it' seems almost impossible to know the truth of something. In this Information Age, I find it harder and harder to really know anything about what's going on in the world. Do I watch Fox News or CNN? Do I want a liberal bias or a conservative bias? Do I want to see crazy hippies with long dreads or rich old white guys and chicks shooting wolves out of a helicopter? It's insane how divided everyone is, black and white, right or left, blah blah blah. I barely watch the news anymore because, what's the point? I'm only getting one side of a story, I'm only getting what a few people want me to see. Someone's always selling something.
Man, did this get off-track. As I said, writing is a strange beast, and it doesn't always go where you think it will. You can run right off the trail and not even realize it, and then you're so far gone you're lost in the woods, and there's nothing to do but to keep on going, keep on writing. That's another thing about writing, about any act of creation, the unknown. The fact that you really don't know how something is going to turn out until it's all over and you look back on it. It's exciting and frightening at the same time.
The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say. ~Mark Twain
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